monkey dolittle

To the polls we go.

Lock up you daughters maybe even you sons, in five days time we will find out if nearly a decade of Ugboot face madness will be revisited at the expense of giving the Grand Master of Foreign Exchange traders a second term. While not wanting to polarise souls with political stance, and given the fact the last time I ticked the box was for the Legalise Cannabis party, I must concede that a coalition of Labour, Greens, NZ First & Mana parties could have some downside. The out of work geriatric tree huggers dream.

Ugboot face has been paid her settlement for signing the Kyoto agreement first and now swans  in and out of the hole in the ozone layer in organic aircraft at will. Probably munching the rug of her mile high partner in crime while her husband spends his time researching if it's medically possible for the two ugliest people on earth to make little politicians. Or will their hideous little offspring have to get a real job. What we must consider, aside from the free lunches for those who were told in the baby boomer hand book to choose red, is there a legacy from the record three term politically correct asexual Labour (or benefit if that's suits better) government that can help those monkeys still on the fence choose our future commander in chief.

And before you start getting hot under the collar there is no underlying racial connotation or reference in the word monkey. I strongly believe we all came from monkeys, so race or colour hold no ownership on the word monkey.Nor do I accept that I should have to refrain using my third favourite word in the context I choose. And I'm not being a clever monkey, nor a cheeky monkey. I just find the word and the in fact the species as a hole very comical and versatile. So unless you have a prehensile tail, are covered in fur and and have a DNA sample to prove you are a monkey, back the fuck off.

It would be interesting to know exactly how many millions of carbon credits NZ tax payers have been forced to buy from the likes of Russia and China (both renown for their clean green style) on the back of signing that ridiculous agreement. I suspect it would come close to paying off the devastation in the shaky flatland. Maybe if it was worded differently ... we could have doubled your unemployment benefit backdated 20 years if we didn't sign the late 20th century's biggest cluster fuck ... there would have been a few less monkeys on the fence.

The right wing doesn't escape without a clip too for that matter. Who the fuck decided a few years ago that Donald Brash would lead the strike force tasked with bringing down the PC party. He was the most PC mofo on the block, lost a leaders debate because he didn't want to interrupt a lady! He said it was disrespectful to woman and preferred to wait until she had finished, what a fucken jub. She not gonna finish you moron its a debate, shes gonna rip you a new arsehole on national TV. And was never proven she was a woman.

That's was almost as crazy as Donald Duck being in charge of winning the world cup. Whoops .... that's right he did!

I wont be voting myself unfortunately as I'm off on a mystery getaway this weekend. The mystery has been solved just quietly but all the same im gonna be wearing speedos for 72 hours and there is no way im gonna potentially cue up next to ACT party constituants in a banana hammock. Look what they did to Rodney Hide! Looks like hes been biting pillows daily ever since they glazed him in oil and made him go ballroom dancing.


spot monkey